Beauties married to beasts often long for experience of
culture and respond powerfully to poems about themselves.
To attract Melania's attention and help her realize
how she's being emotionally starved to death and get her
thinking that there might be a way out, I've composed five
sonnets. This is the first:
From what dull dream have you awakened,
Old boy, to a morning in Barstow, Needles,
Or another hot as hell desert truck stop
Whose Burger Kings, Taco Bells, and Arby’s
You have chosen out of mere perversity
As your semi-final resting place? Semi-final
Because you’ll not die here, you just thought
You might and half-wanted to since the
Drive into Los Angeles seemed too long.
But there a better dream awaits you:
Melania Trump in an old Civic pulls up
Beside you on La Brea Ave and asks
To borrow your Visa card and you say
Yes, Melania! Here it is, here is my card!