According to Hans Ludens, heir to the cough-drop fortune,
in his opus on “operational philosophy,” Heidegger
was not a Nazi, a coward, and the foremost European mind
of his time but a misguided misunderstood pragmatist
who mislaid his childhood in the Black Forest
where a man without a nose met a man without a face
and quoted Foucault’s Madness and Civilization.
In the novel he didn’t write Heidegger married
a Jewess and emigrated to Amerika with her.
Her name was Erika and she was a lesbian professor
with a monocle, and the question remains would
the “Schwarzwald redneck” have eloped to save
his ass we know what he did he saluted the corporal
and that was his dirty secret in New Jersey where
he voted for happy Humphrey and now they’re all dead
but this tenured faker who knowingly infected his fans.
-- David Lehman
First published in Hanging Loose. The picture of David holding the head of Goliath is by Caravaggio.
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