"Gossip" [by Nin Andrews]

Gossip
or the Parable for the Homosexual Man

My father loved gossip and defended it all the time. It’s where the truth always lies, and vice versa, he liked to say. And besides, history and religion are mostly gossip, written by nitwits to cover up important truths. So my father was always rewriting the past, or telling another version of what once was, way back when. Martin Luther, he liked to tell his peacenik Lutheran friends, should be remembered for inciting hatred of the Jews. (It’s true: Luther encouraged the burning of Jewish synagogues, homes and prayer books.) Theologians are always flawed, he would add. Which is why he liked Descartes, who didn’t doubt that he doubted, and concluded, I think therefore I am. Je pense donc je suis. Cogito ergo sum. Like Aristotle, he was sure reason was a gift, as was wonder. Though Descartes, according to my father, kicked dogs. And Aristotle preferred shellfish to women. Like Jesus, Aristotle was probably homosexual. If you actually read the New Testament, which few Christians do, alas, you’d realize how little Jesus liked the ladies. Instead he preferred finding heaven on earth with his twelve men, and was, of course, crucified in the end. The Christ story does make a good parable for the homosexual man.

-- Nin Andrews

Comments

[Sally]

Preach it, Nin. I'm right there witcha.