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June 28, 2009

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Sadly, I didn't watch Hung. We don't get HBO, and our TV is on the fritz. So I can't comment on the show.

I have to confess, I've never been very aware of what is happening on TV. I grew up without one. And once, when a friend referred to a woman as a real June Cleaver, I asked if June Cleaver was Eldridge Cleaver's mother. (I've still never seen Leave It to Beaver.)

Yeah, I've said a few dumb things in my time. So when TV is the topic, I usually keep my mouth zippered.

Penises on the other hand, I might be able to comment on. I am reminded of how my French professor said once that the French had a whole assortment of words for them. I imagined that maybe there was a guidebook to penises, available only in France. You know how the French are. So much more liberated than we are. Or so the French always tell me. My French professor also said breasts had many names. Large breasts, for example, were called a balcony to the world. But what of a large penis? I wondered. Would they call it an airplane to heaven? Or a jet plane? Or maybe a mere ski jump? I'm not sure I've found the perfect metaphor. Like the perfect penis. But I'm keeping a parachute handy, just in case.

Could this be the ideal show -- a distraction if not an antidote -- for those times when the taker of Viagra or Cialis has one of those four-hour erections that seem to be popular these days?

It's also sad to think how they might create a metaphor for a deflated economy; the poetry or the penis? Sad either way.

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