Cori and the Kitten! Yes! (by Mitch Sisskind)

My favorite movie scene is the one where the detective and his wife are sound asleep and the phone rings on the night table. The detective quickly awakens, picks up the phone, and says, "I'll be right over" or "I'm on my way!" I feel really safe and secure whenever I watch a scene like that. It's so very familiar, like an old shoe. Versions of it have been in lots of movies but never enough for me.

Along the same lines, sometimes when I'm stuck in a a traffic jam (happens every day) I listen to call in shows on the NPR station. Often a caller will complain that the attention wasted on celebrity gossip or other drivel should be devoted to serious topics like health care or climate change. Whenever I hear that I get the same warm, reassuring feeling that comes with the scene of the detective waking up. I feel the same way when somebody says that lots of other people were killed in car crashes like Princess Diana but there were no newspaper articles about those people. I love it!

So if you feel so inclined, please "make my day" by inveighing against the two video clips below. The first one appeared just yesterday. It's a nice long "Today Show" interview with Tiger Woods' girlfriend Cori Rist -- and it couldn't be more wonderful! I love everything about this interview and I've watched it many times. I really don't think any detail has escaped me. And yes, yes, I should be watching interviews with Joe Lieberman, which makes it even better. In fact, just thinking about Joe Lieberman (or Paul Krugman, if you prefer) in conjunction with this video gives me a tremendous rush of Mr. Snoid-like pleasure. Lawrence Summers and Cori Rist! Timothy Geithner! OMG!

But that's not all. How about a "cute kitten" video that has gotten almost twelve million views?! Think of it! The cute kitten video is 17 seconds long. Multiply 17 seconds by twelve million and you've got a lot of time that could have been devoted to Joe Lieberman, Paul Krugman, or climate change. Where's the phone? I've got to call NPR!

I could go on and on. But without further ado I offer these two masterpieces for your pleasure or annoyance, as the case may be.

Comments

[Laura Orem]

I'd much rather watch a cute kitten than Joe Lieberman. Or even Tiger Woods.

[Stacey]

That's one hard-hitting interview! Thanks for posting it. I have a lot to think about. I wonder Mitch what your favorite parts are. Also she must be wearing industrial-grade mascara because her tears can't make it run.

[mitch s.]

in reply to stacey, i noticed that the interviwer is wearing boots while cori's legs are bare. cori also never moves her legs. i'm not sure exactly how to interpret this. cori seemed like she might have been botoxed and lip-plumped, but again i'm not sure. to me it seems unlikely that a 31-year old woman would have that kind of treatment, but i've been told i'm wrong about that. cori also seemed to me very well-spoken and "classy," but she's been portrayed as a total bimbo in the media. i definitely thought she was more attractive and "softer" than the interviewer. it has been said that she worked as an escort -- or whore, as the best ones prefer to be called -- and i believe this is probably true. the fact that she denies it maybe calls other things about her into question. it has been established that she received a 100k wire transfer payment from someone other than tiger. she seems pretty intelligent and maybe she will decide to continue he education after all this blows over. maybe she will even write some poems! much more likely, however, that she'll pose for playboy.

[jim cummins]

I have to say, I really enjoyed this, Mitch. I haven't been following the "scandal" to much extent because I've been so worried about some of the things that Paul Krugman has been saying. But some advice: don't answer Stacey's question about what your favorite "parts" are. It's clearly a set-up; there's no good answer here, believe me. Though "legs" is probably okay. Oh, wait: "eyes"!

[DL]

And then someone points out that more people are killed in car accidents every year than in plane crashes or terrorism. The analogy of detective movie conventions and NPR is an inspired one, and you're right about Joe Lieberman. He has attained what we can call push-button status. Say his name and you push the button. As Flaubert did with the "dictionary of received ideas," we could have a good time rendering the right thing to say upon mention of Bill Clinton, Lindsay Lohan, JLo, and don't forget Ben Bernanke.