I’ve said it before but I feel like the most appropriate
author photo for a writer with a significant other is a picture of said writer
doing something like sitting with their head in their hands or staring at the
ceiling or lying in the fetal position under the dining room table weeping and
behind them their partner staring at them with a look that says, “Really? Isn’t
this what we did yesterday?”
Take my partner, Penelope Cruz.* Today in Los Angeles, in
between interviews and a photo shoot and doing her doctoral work, she sat down
next to me on the couch and said, “If you do not figure out what to write for
Sports Desk I don’t want to think what’s going to happen to you.” I might have
put a sort of curse on myself earlier in the day and said something like, “If I
don’t finish this post today then…” It’s not worth getting into the exact
nature of the curse. It does involve my abilities to sit down and also process
Thai food.
“Just say it,” she said. In addition to being a very fine
actress, Penelope knows that I have a secret. For the last two weeks she has been urging me to write about
it and I’ve done things like sit on the couch and stare at the ceiling and say,
“You don’t even like sports. You can’t understand.” I don’t want to brag but
some people have told me my theatrical abilities are “really something.” The
thing is, she’s right. All these weeks I’ve been holding back. I’ve been
getting requests for the next Sports Desk column and everyone seems to want the
same thing. Penelope gets off of skype with Pedro and says, “For goodness sakes
just tell them.” And then she kisses me. A lot.
Fine.
I do not give a damn about March Madness.
Go ahead. Tell me how great it is. That it’s the only sport you like. That we get to see basketball the way an old white guy from Canada intended it. It’s about the love of the game. It’s about the little guy. It’s about the school you teach for and so who cares that you don’t like sports because OH MY GOD, BAYLOR!!!!!
I told Penelope this was going to be the post where I lost
all my readers. It’s not that I don’t like college basketball. I actually love
it. I particularly love women’s basketball. I’m from Connecticut. I grew up during the era of Rebecca Lobo
and the first truly great UConn women’s team. Every kid in Connecticut wore a
UConn jersey at one point or another. I love the fact that women’s games sell
out even more than the men’s and I love the fact that last year, coming home
from Columbia, MO I sat on the shuttle to St. Louis with a family member of
UConn’s star player, Maya Moore and we talked all about how amazing that
program is and all the opportunities she has and what a thing it is to watch a
young woman do what she does best in the world, and better than most. I love how
excited the crowds get and that it’s not like a Lakers game or Knicks game
where very few hard working people can afford a seat and kids from poor
backgrounds who love the sport sure can’t see a game live. I love the spirit of it. I like the
idea of it. I love all those people driving across the country and screaming in
bars and kids running down the court and cutting the net down when they win. I
love that Vermont gets to play in a televised game and get their hats handed to
them by Syracuse but who cares because oh my gosh they got there. March
Madness!!!!
It’s getting a little warm in here. Maybe I do love March
Madness.
I don’t love watching women athletes reach the height of
their career at the age of 20. I know, WNBA, Olympics, Europe. Whatever. It’s
not the same. The women who play basketball on teams like UConn and Tennessee
are having their professional careers right now. And they aren’t getting
compensated for it. The WNBA is not a success. The women who play in the Sweet
16 during March Madness will have a bigger and more consistent television
audience than they ever will if they play professionally.
The team salary cap within the WNBA for the year 2013 (yes,
three years from now) is $913,000.
Let’s just say that figure again. $913,000.
Here are a few other figures from the Altius Directory:
*
WNBA Champion - $10,500 per player
*
Championship Runner-up - $5,250 per player
*
Eliminated in semifinals - $2,625 per player
*
Eliminated in quarterfinals - $1,050 per player
*
Most Valuable Player Award - $15,000
*
All-WNBA First Team Award - $10,000 per player
*
All-WNBA Second Team Award - $5,000 per player
*
Defensive Player Award - $5,000
*
Sportsmanship Award - $5,000
*
Rookie of the Year Award - $5,000
*
Most Improved Player Award - $5,000
*
Rookie minimum salary: $34,500
*
Average rookie salary: $36,500, plus daily allowance
*
Veteran (over 3 years with the WNBA) minimum: $50,000,
*
Maximum salary: $95,000
· Team
salary cap: $750,000, which teams may exceed by 4%
There are 34 games in a season. 43 if you make it all the
way. It’s hard on your body and
even if you play pro your career is short. You’re going to have surgeries and
lots of medical bills and, oh yes, many college stars are still going to have
student loans to pay off. Imagine if you were better at what you did than most
people in the world and that many of the guys you went to school with were
making either insane money professionally or pretty good money in Europe. It’s
a hard pill to swallow and when I see all those women in one place, playing so
beautifully, and I know that many of them came from situations as economically
desperate as their male counterparts, it takes some of the joy out of it for
me. And when I read how much money schools make on the backs of these
women... I still cheer for them and
I am so happy they get their moment on television but I also think it’s sad.
* My partner’s name is
actually Angeline. She won’t let me use her last name. She’s the one standing
there in the photo of me lying beneath my desk with my head in the trash
basket.